Hello, E.

This is a letter to you, by you. Its basically to say stop being such a B lately. Your mom is crazy, your brother is mean and demands far too much gas money when he picks you up, your sister is explosive, your other brother is a nerd, and your dad is surviving. Your dog, however, is cute and when you lay down to do crunches, she rolls on her back and starts moving around, looking at you with eager eyes. Its adorable, and you know it.

So, E, basically, you need to stop worrying about your figure. Its fine. Infact, its probably more than fine, but I dont want to inflate your ego. Yes, you may not like your butt, and your abs may not be on par with the Victoria Secret models but they are not far behind. And yes, Jon does have an amazing body that makes you feel squishy, but he's making it good FOR you not AGAINST you. So grab your camera and some popcorn. Except less creepy.

And E? You just finished your english course. Give yourself a freaking high five. You, with the help of American School, ruled a years worth of english which you, yourself, crammed into your knoggin. Kudos. I've also noticed via observation that if you simply turned off your phone, turned off the computer, 
and flipping studied a few hours a day that you would OWN the rest of high school. You would be free of this sillines and begin training for whichever career you choose. Hell, you'll actually have time without mass amounts of stress to take some dance classes. maybe some fighting ones. Fencing is beast as hell, and you could own any man at church.

Oh, and one more thing: Dont shut yourself off emotionaly. Its over and fixed. It hurt, we know, let it go. Were tired of hearing it. Tired of thinking it. Letting your mind be consumed by it. Its done. And Ps: Dont over analyze your relationship with Jon more than you already do simply because you've had a suck-fest of a year so far. He's a man, complete with barriers, simple thoughts and annoyance at 
bringing up subjects that will, in their own time, present themselves. And for GODS SAKE, do not dwell on the text messages you send to each other. 
Would you  please move on? Christ. Youre driving me insane. And as to those close moments in december? Stop thinking about them. Its making both of our heads hurt. You have a lifetime of those scenes to actually play out in REALITY (reality? whats that!) so just knock it off. ugh.

Elysia, you know that weird, selfish feeling you've been having? Its because you actually have been emtionally selfish lately. Its called investing ni the other person. Not heard of it? Well, that could be because you've been too busy nursing your wounds or else preparing for the wounds which undoubtedly be pressed upon you. Its life. Deal with it. Youre strong enough to be matched at 16 to a man in the Air Force. Dont be such a baby, baby.

Hey, Mahardy? Because she's not in that 'mom' state of mine anymore, doesnt mean she's not your mom. And yeah, she did choose him over you, essentialy, but its how things work sometimes. God gives the most difficult situations to the strongest of people, so you should be flattered. I know your heart hurts and its not hard to make you cry, and the thought of her often times makes you sick, but you, girl-o, are not a weak woman. So chin up, and take care of that boy.

Love and sarcasm,
Your Conscience.